“No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.”
― CARL JUNG
I spent most of my adult life trying to avoid suffering. It made everything worse. I spent my days waiting, hoping for my knight in shining armour. The funny thing is she existed; I just didn’t have the courage to ask her for help. I was too afraid to challenge my beliefs.
I also didn’t understand the paradoxical nature of change. That you have to first accept who you are, that you have to first accept your life circumstances.
“Misfortune weighs most heavily on those who expect nothing but good fortune.”
Have you ever noticed how we’re taught that our wants and desires have everything to do with our suffering, yet we’re also taught to “live in hope”? Have you ever stopped to consider how these messages might muddy the waters?
You see it all over the blogosphere, of course. “Don’t give up,” “Hang in there,” “Never lose hope”…
But what, exactly, are we supposed to never lose hope for? A perfect body? A million dollars? For becoming a celebrity so we may be adored forever? …
Apparently, most of us have a default level of happiness. No matter what our station is in life, we are all slightly dissatisfied. Slightly. Life is just never quite good enough, even when it really is.
This default happiness level readjusts depending on your circumstances. Even if something significant happens to you, like winning the lottery, you soon get over it and return to that base level of slight dissatisfaction.
Luckily this works in reverse too!
If you have a divorce, for example, or end up in an accident that leaves you paralysed — studies have shown that although your…
Most of us experience stalling at some stage in our lives. In our attempts to be all we can. In our attempts to climb as high as we can, as fast as we can.
The problem is, like an aeroplane, we can only climb so fast. If we pitch the nose up too high or carry too much weight, we run the risk of stalling. And if we do, then we’re only left with one choice.
Just like an aeroplane, the only way to recover — the only way — is to point the nose back towards the ground. …
While I was trying to sleep the other night, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was missing something fundamental. Something important about everything that has been happening this past year or so. This started to make me feel a little anxious.
So, I placed my mind on that fear, and I asked, “What do you want me to figure out?” Then something clicked. The dots connected, and I thought, “Holy shit, all fear is a fear of death. That’s what you’re feeling. That’s why it’s so intense. It’s a trick! …
Are you lacking direction in life? Not sure which way you should turn?
Do you have a big problem with no idea how to proceed? Like whether you should quit the job you hate?
Or perhaps you’ve lost your job and have no idea what the hell you should do next?
Maybe you’re simply having a bit of trouble processing difficult emotions?
Whatever it is, dear readers, fear not — for I have something that can help you formulate the ultimate solution. (No promises.)
Introducing the CLEAR model! …
I was watching an interview with John Cleese recently and he said something that got me thinking. When asked about his creative process he said, “You cannot bully the subconscious. It simply doesn’t work.” He went on to say that his best work always happened spontaneously.
He still had a process, it’s just that the muse didn’t always play ball. Often the work that resulted wasn’t very good. They’d have days where none of the material was used.
He noted, it is usually when they weren’t trying to make something happen — when they were simply messing around — that…